Sometimes what I see here on the streets of D.C. reminds me of the things I saw in ‘Nam. Like many other homeless in D.C. and across America, I am a Vietnam War veteran. During my time in the war, I saw a lot of things; some of it I can talk about, and some of it I can’t. I can say, though, that back then I saw a lot of homelessness. I saw villagers living in shacks, with no food, water, or medical help. Today, I’m homeless myself, and even though it’s different, I see those same problems here in America. It makes it especially hard to deal with my homelessness when it reminds me of Vietnam.
During the war I would always ask myself, “Why, God, do I have to do this?” The war was real hard because the same people we were trying to watch over, we’d also have to fight against. It was like, one day, I’d go into the bar, and the next day, we’d have to kill the man who served us our drinks. There’s a lot I can’t talk about because what I saw was just so bad. Even though I still talk on and off with some guys from the war, we don’t talk about what happened then. We can only talk about what’s going on today because we’re always trying to forget the war.
It’s been hard to cope with sometimes. For years I tried to medicate myself, like lots of other veterans do. We try to forget what we’ve done over there, because like I said, what we did was real sad. It doesn’t affect me like it used to anymore, but sometimes I still get depressed and need to talk to my therapist. The difference now is I’m six years sober, and part of that is because I’ve learned that I can’t let what I did back then keep me down today. I got help and I think other veterans should, too. Even groups like AA and NA have helped me deal with it because they keep me focused on what I have to do. I know all that drugging and stuff isn’t where it’s at if you want to get better. I have to move on with my life, and so does every other homeless veteran.
To all the veterans around the world, be strong. Stick in there and do what you’ve got to do for yourself by God’s grace.
