Billy Luck, Episode 5: Humping the Merchandise

Alison Heasley

In an upstairs room at the Astoria, Billy lingers with a dancer named Elaine. Meanwhile, in the skin shop downstairs, Cholo and Ferret prepare for another day…

Outside the Astoria rooming house (though the building was called  “HOTEL”), Cholo muttered to himself as he tussled with the heavy steel padlock on the front of the “Heaven” Book Store. As soon as the hasp flew open, Ferret (popularly known as ‘Apache’) dashed through the open doorway of the shop.

Ferret went flying over several unopened stacks of “Hustler,” “Penthouse,” and “Swank” magazines. “Git busy with them bundles, Apache, ya punk!” bellowed the stocky Samoan boss.

“Sheet,” snarled his feral-faced little clerk. “This is nineteen-seventy-seven, Cholo,”

“So?” responded the head man, stubby arms akimbo. “Get busy! Cut the damn BUNDLES!–Need a knife, kid?”

Ferret leered, revealing pointy tiny teeth. He brandished a sparkling box cutter blade, seemingly out of nowhere. Cholo, awed, moved back a step. “You scare me with those moves,” Cholo murmured.

“Hol’it,bub…” Ferret cocked his head up and leftward to a patch of swaybacked cracked ceiling, which seemed to be moving. Was the building about to collapse? “No, listen. Do y’hear that creaking sound? Somebody upstairs is DOIN’ it! Hear?”

“Aw you nasty lil’ chickenhawk! Tha’s what people do here, Don’cha get that?”

Billy and Elaine, up in her aqua-walled quarters, were merely locked in a glance of mutual affection. But they heard the squeaking sounds, too. She grinned, foolishly. “Lupe must have company, think so?”

Billy stood up. “‘Fraid I don’t have Loopy’s acquaintance, look Elaine, I better go downstairs and check out the work situation in the bookstore, y’think?”

Elaine regarded him with warm admiration. “Go for it, Tiger.”

“See ya in a bit,” Billy drawled, as the warped door clunked shut behind him.

Down below, Cholo growled at Ferret. “Get busy, punk, we don’t wanna set a bad impression for the new employee.”

Ferret snapped his oily head around, There in the entryway stood Billy Luck.

Right from jump street Ferret felt a strong distaste for this individual.

Billy tapped lightly on the glass.

“Okay if I come in, Mister Cholo?”

Any friend of Elaine sweetie is a pard’o mine,” grunted Cholo.

Ferret groaned and tore into cutting twine cord around the magazines with renewed fervor. “This dude is a problem, I can tell,” he whispered to no one in particular.”

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