A stormy sky

I was once a beauty queen. A professional model with everything going for me. A beautiful smile with dimples, beautiful makeup and my hair was long. Hairstyles from flips to mushrooms, pinned up with chopsticks, upswept style, braids. I had dynamic clothes: Sergio Valente, Jordache, BonJour- you name it, I had it. I was offered parts by famous movie stars – just by modeling, I was expanding my career. I modeled to my favorite songs, such as “Glow of Love” by Luther Vandross and “Hot on a Thang” by Chilites, on the runway in New York.

It was very hard modeling — diet, high heels — keeping the figure. I lived at home with my parents, tried to figure out my life. What to do at 15 years old. When I finally got old enough I took a job working in the government and slowed the modeling down. I got involved with guys, and got hurt, became depressed. The first guy cheated on me, most guys I dated hurt me. Finally, I was with one guy for five years. I was so in love with him that we moved in together. Then it became violent and he betrayed me. Beatings and attacks, he put me in the hospital. He almost killed me several times. He caused me to have a nervous breakdown. I wanted to kill myself. I figured I was unattractive to everyone. I did drugs, a lot, hard. I drank heavily everyday and smoked a pack of cigarettes a day. Many times, he would take my hard-earned money to spend on another gal. I worked at a hotel.

I was a room attendant and housekeeper at the Ritz Carlton, Sheraton, Omnim, Marriott Washington Court, Hotel Washington, Harrington Hotel and Madison Hotel. I was with a temp agency and went from job to job. It was hard. Hard taking the beatings, getting black eyes, busted lips and getting hit in the face while going to work. I was hit with a pole, struck in the head, called names and thrown out of vehicles. He almost had me killed over drugs. It got so he didn’t care about me. I cared for him so much, I made three-course meals every day and showed him the best of me. He never loved me, he loved my money. Love hurts when you ask, “Do you love me?” and the answer is “No.” How do you take “no” for an answer? So I left him.

Afterwards, I worked many different jobs:

1. D.C. Superior Court-Juvenile Counselor

2. Treasury Department- Secretary, File Clerk and Typist

3. Department of Labor

4. Smithsonian- Grill Cook

5. Georgetown Hospital- Dietary, Food Staff, Cashier

6. George Washington Hospital- Dietary, Food Staff, Cashier

7. Nationals Stadium- Food Service

8. Subway Sandwich

9. Billy’s Pit Beef

10. International Square Farragut West

I always kept a job-now a hotel job is what keeps me in my apartment in Silver Spring. Still I ask the angels, “Do you hear me?” Why can’t we be with the ones we love?