Dear Santa,
I’ve been really good this year. I returned to selling Street Sense and I have tried to be as generous with others as my customers have been with me. I hope you find it in your heart to put me on the “nice” list and pay me a visit this year. I’d be more appreciative if you could drop off the following:
1. A warm new coat, as the zippers on both of mine have broken.
2. A cooperative Congress, so that our government can actually get something done about the economy without a bunch of partisan baloney.
3. A lease on a new place to live, and the keys to go with it.
4. A new Palestinian homeland, so the people in the Middle East can lay off Israel and everyone can just chill out.
5. A prepaid, no-contract cell phone, so I can get some business done and maybe get a job.
6. An extension of the hours of operation at every branch on the DC Public Library, from 9 a.m. to 9 p.m.
7. The phone number of an available, local woman who has brains, beauty and emotional stability.
8. A $1 million donation to Street Sense, so that the paper can expand and more poor and homeless writers can have a place to publish and profit from their work.
9. The winning numbers to any Powerball drawing next year.
10. That all my customers, as well as all Street Sense supporters, staff and vendors, have a safe and happy holiday season.
